May 2013
84 posts
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Watchdecided to do a quick vlog before i leave. the volume is super low btw.
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sonequa martin green is so beautiful & i love her acting. she’s on my favorite shows : the walking dead & once upon a time. i like her on both shows but more so on the walking dead since that’s when i was first introduced to her. she makes me hate her character tamara on once upon a time. mainly due to the fact that her & her buddy does not like magic which also means...
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broken fixtures can’t be mended with bandages. they just cover scars temporarily. time has allowed me to break + mend & move on. there was a time when i didn’t think that was possible. a time when i was on edge all the time. i was bitter and angry with everyone. no one could tell me different & it wasn’t for them to do so. you have to evaluate your worth & know that...
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my exterior can be very direct & somewhat unapproachable to people who are easily comforted by smiles & pleasant greetings. it doesn’t mean that i don’t intend to be nice at some point. it just means that you should give it time. i usually come around after a while. time & patience is everything.
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it just dawned on me that the girl who played anne frank in the ‘09 version is the same girl from being human and game of thrones. she just has that familiar type face. i believe her name is ellie kendrick. you can tell i watch british television. i seriously want bbc america to get on it’s game.
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i look up to men like martin luther king jr, malcom x, langston hughes, bill cosby, spike lee, will smith, denzel washington, gordon parks, miles davis, john coltrane, michael jackson & etc to be completely honest . i never want to be ignorant to the fact that these men have truly made an impact in my life in whatever way because they have. i am always learning something knew about their...
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to be anything other than a human being first will always baffle me ..& maybe because i am on the other side of this invisible fence makes me feel like i have to defend myself at times when i shouldn’t have to. i hate the what if questions as well as those questions where people demand answers because i honestly have none to give or should i say i am not obliged to give an answer....
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my thoughts come alive when i ink them to paper. i can be as honest as i want with no judgement or doubt. i am free to speak my whole mind, my inner truths & shed light on sins that others would probably over analyze. i can be as mad as i want & as bold as i am through written letters to myself. that’s what ink to paper is for me. a voice that’s louder than i could ever attempt...
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many women floor me with their intelligence. it’s a form of beauty that will always win over anything else. i talk to quite a few for hours just to hear them talk about things they’re passionate about. it makes me smile & makes me want to learn new things. for this reason alone i am open. i am open to all things that are new to me. all things that will help me know worlds i may...
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i welcome new people into my life as they welcome me into theirs. we don’t know what we’ll mean to each other right away but in due time the layers unfold & things become what they become. there are a certain few that spark fireworks & others that i simply adore and nothing more but i never let it be my decision. i follow the chemistry if there’s any between me &...
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when i’m into someone they’ll know it. i’m not always blunt about it - not that i can’t be because i can but it drives people to fear and i don’t want anyone to be afraid of my forwardness. i’m human you know? we tend be so afraid to be forward because of what others may think of us. they won’t like you for many reasons but that special person will love...
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my truth is too forward to be masked with metaphors.
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i’ve been close to quite a few people over the years. probably closer than i should’ve been in most cases but none the less there was a closeness there. people have always been attached to me but i have never figured that out. i mean, i’m me period. that’s all i know how to be. i don’t want to be figured out but at the same time i am open. my flaws & truths are on...
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life goals : to have my music in a film or tv show, see my photography in a magazine & be an extra on a tv show. if i could do all of those things & more my life would be made even if i wasn’t paid. it’s all about the experience & what you gain from them. plus it sounds like fun & that’s what i’m about.
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the weather can be a dangerous thing man. i’ve been trying to keep up with all the tornadoes that have been going on all over & i just can’t. they freak me out more than anything else because they can rip through a whole city at speeds that most likely leave you stuck where you are forcing you to ride it out. the one that was on the news today was just furious. i’m sure the...
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i can vibe with almost anyone as long as me and my space is respected. too many people try to invade that by telling me what’s right for me. that’s a line that needs no crossing. i am still trying to figure things out & mistakes will be made along the way but if you are here for me, you’ll understand my journey as i learn to understand yours. let’s help each other not...
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be careful when it comes to the energy you put into the universe. it will certainly change the way people view you.
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if you aren’t willing to make the sacrifice, a real sacrifice for all of what you believe in, you aren’t really ready to take on the world. there’s a certain level of bravery you must have, that’s felt that you’ll never mistake for doubt. you just know & you fight for whatever those beliefs are until the end.
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our insecurities & doubt cloud our best qualities. we tend to focus on the negative too much. is that societies doing is it our own? when you look into the mirror you see yourself in hi def. you know your flaws, you know your past, the people you’ve forgiven or haven’t, those that you have fell in love with or waiting to fall for, you know your heart & it’s guide to...
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music is the root to our past. it’s buried in our memories. they hit us at times when we least expect it & remember things we haven’t felt in years. many are connected to our childhood. a time where you were only beginning to know life for what it is but still young enough to be care free. music is how you remember & never forget.
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when i’m an emotional wreck i like to be left alone. i like to cry in peace & break things when no one is around. i just like to let the emotions leave me. i don’t put a time limit on that because every reason will be a different. some people don’t know how to let others break + mend. so they never do..
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i don’t need validation but i am always looking for affection. i’m always trying to fill the empty voids of it’s missing presence in my life but it’s never been fulfilled. i’m not going to burden myself with what people think of me. i’m here in this present moment willing to be all truth as long as those who are willing to listen do so without judgement. if you...
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i finally watched scandal the same time as everyone else tonight. i tried not to be too caught up into the commentary & actually watch it - do you know how hard that is when people are stating the facts & making me laugh at the same time? lol. no one in my house watches it but me & they don’t understand why it’s so good. it really is a good show. next season is going to be...
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this guy brought $1000 worth of $20 scratch offs and decided to youtube his journey. i’m watching part 5 & so far dude doesn’t have the best luck. i would have invested in the cheaper scratch offs & had more luck than him. maybe he’ll win. i’m still watching. this is pretty interesting.
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so i’m sitting here listening to disco music thinking that i’d only know a few songs or should i say i’d only like the ones i knew growing up but it turns out i liked & kept majority of them. they are bringing out my inner napoleon dynamite! sidenote : i’m about to watch that now lol.
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some of you people have an amazing journey whether it be health + fitness, skin regimes or natural hair journeys, it makes me smile & very proud of you guys. i need all of your energy & patience. please & thank you!
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i build & break many relationships that form but not intentionally.
what’s a best friend? are they meant to be there forever? through thick & thin? because to me that sounds like a bond bounded through blood or marriage & even those relationships are subject to change. what i’m saying is that people who were in my life for those layers that were peeled back were close to...
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trains always ride through around this time & they always distract me in that moment. it’s pretty loud but my thoughts are louder. truth. i avoid things. i don’t always speak my inner feelings into existence. sometimes i wait. i wait to see how the next person feels. most of the time i get nothing. i become frustrated & tend to want to give up. i’m stubborn. maybe that...
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i only really smile / laugh my ass off when deqa texts me lol. she makes my night so much better sometimes. other times she forgets to even say goodnight. she can be sooo rude. i’m joking to a degree lol.
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watching season 2 episode 12 of grey’s anatomy while coming to the realization that shepard / grey & burke / yang are getting on my nerves with their relationships. it’s awkward. each relationship is just so awkward. they move forward & then take steps back. ain’t nobody got time for that. my favorite characters so far have to be bailey, izzie & george even though he...
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if you’re going to date the same sex date that individual because you’re interested in them - not for the experience. this is not a free ride. you can’t just come along when you get bored with your life & decide to switch it up. get to know people for who they are, truly. this is why so many of us are skeptical of being open. after all there’s really no need to be so...
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if zoe saldana decides to have children with any woman i think it should be me. i vote for myself. not ready for kids but i’m so ready for her lol.
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i look at my older photography & see edits i could’ve made if i hadn’t shot them in jpg & wish i could reshoot them but then i see the authenticity of non edits & it makes me proud of myself at the same time. the info that many other photographers have given me over the years has helped me a lot. i try not to think about the smaller details that much but i have learned a...
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before i go to bed i think about the mistakes i made during the day. some big & some small. some bother me & others don’t. i tend to let things mean more than they should which is an issue for me. at times i have to sit & ask myself if what i’m letting drain me is worth the energy. then i have to ask myself will it make a difference in the morning or will i look back &...
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my life isn’t hectic but my brain is. my mind is reminiscent of busy streets in new york. my thoughts are like naughty strangers lurking after hours looking for excitement. i stumble across things i can’t take back even if i wanted to. i don’t regret nothing i’ve said to anyone thus far. i accept the choices i have made. i am not at all mad at where i currently am but i am...
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there’s no way that life is not mapped out in a specific order. there’s no way that all of this happened by coincidence & that it isn’t supposed to be apart of our history. people die. we all die. that’s not what living is about though. it’s about learning & growing. it’s about allowing yourself to be used for a bigger picture. it’s apart of...
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